The Envelope Please
Wednesday morning when I wandered into my office in my robe and slippers to proof Jekyll and Hyde one more time before it published, I found a comment from Cheryl of The Art of Being Conflicted. I have something for you over at my blog, waiting for you to pick it up, it said. I’ve been around the neighborhood long enough to know that such an invitation usually means a Blog Award so I clicked on over to see. Sure enough, Cheryl had given me the Overlord Award. The what, you say? Me, too, so I traced the genealogy of this thing. It seems to have originated at Rainy of the Dark on March 31, 2011 as an act of Thursday Silliness. Rainy of the Dark focuses on blog promotion aligned with the needs and necessities of artists, luminaries, and Overlords. I’m not exactly sure what that means but the blog is worth a look. The name of award seems to reflect a childhood fantasy regarding world domination. These things fascinate me. How did the award make it from the young and edgy sounding Rainy of the Dark to a sixty-six year old curmudgeon posting on his older perspective? Viral, my friends, viral. If just two people who received the award on each day awarded it to someone else on the next, there are over a billion awards out there. Given this, you might guess that starting your own award is one way of promoting your blog.
Still, it’s nice to be recognized, especially by a blogger you appreciate. Cheryl posts on everything from a guy in England who has a collection of anatomically correct love-dolls to First Amendment rights. Her style is humorous and edgy and conversational … and she finishes every post with The Good, The Bad and The Weird for the Day. Take a look. Now to the inevitable requirements that come with the award: (1) List 3 things you would change if you were Overlord; (2) List 10 blogs you think are worthy of world domination; (3) Leave them a message in their comment sections with a link saying you chose them.
It seems to me there are three approaches to being an Overlord. You can wave your scepter (or whatever it is Overlords wave) and just make it so. Or, you can take the approach the extraterrestrial sea creatures took in The Abyss … create huge tidal waves standing along every coast and say, OK, humans, if you don’t straighten out, it’s eternal bath time. 
Or you can respect free will. Remember Jim Carey’s bumbling Bruce, given God’s powers by Morgan Freeman’s God in Bruce Almighty? Trying to win back his girlfriend, Grace (Jennifer Aniston), Bruce asks God, How can I make her love me without violating free will? Welcome to my world, God replies. At risk of seeming to critique the Divine Plan as it exists, I’m going make some small modifications to human anatomy but leave free will alone.
1. Once a person has spoken for five minutes, their jaw will lock. In order to unlock it, they must listen attentively to someone else for fifty-five minutes. Perhaps if we’re forced to listen, we’ll learn to work together.
Older Eyes tells a lie
2. A small circular patch of skin (known as the believenum) in the center of each person’s forehead will respond to the truthfulness of what they are saying. When they speak the truth, it will match their skin and be invisible but it will turn bright green when they lie. Covering it or removing it surgically will cause immediate death. This way, we’re free to lie, it just doesn’t fool anyone.
3. Name-calling will cause extreme belching and flatulence. Perhaps then we can stick to the facts.
Now, blogs. Well, I’d encourage you to take a look at my Blogs I Read links in the sidebar if you want ten. But changing the world requires a certain degree of attitude, so I offer you these five:
thesinglecell – plenty of attitude and a sharp sense of humor
(life)lessons – facing life with the right attitude
Down River Drivel – plenty to say … with down river attitude
Granny1947′s Blog – South Africa’s queen of one liners
Momma Mia, Mea Culpa – Vodka Is Great, But This Isn’t Half Bad … how’s that for attitude?
Enjoy. And thanks again, Cheryl.
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Tags: blog awards, blogging, curmudgeonly rants, humor, Life, movies, postaday2011, smiles, writing and blogging
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May 5, 2011 at 8:52 am
Wow… I’m honored! Thank you!
May 5, 2011 at 6:45 pm
“Honored” doesn’t quite describe your response on your blog …
May 5, 2011 at 10:18 am
Aw! Bud!! Thank you so much. I am flattered, and honored. You’re awesome!
May 5, 2011 at 6:45 pm
C’mon, you know you deserve it!
May 5, 2011 at 10:21 am
Hi Bud, Thanks for the kind words. I was over visiting your 5 picks, VERY NICE.
The green believenum is going to be a huge problem for me. The minute a person asks me “does my butt look big in these jeans?” I am a goner. Just can’t bring myself to say “Yeah, freakin huge”
Because I will already be dead, I guess the name calling isn’t such a problem. If by some miracle, I have survived the surgical removal of the believenum, I will be staying home a lot. (no one will be around me) Face it, Rod Blagojevich’s trial is going on right now and I call him names out loud during all news reports. He, unfortunately, isn’t my only name calling target. BELCH…excuse me
May 5, 2011 at 6:48 pm
It’s funny … my son had exactly the same reaction … “What are you going to do when someone asks if their ass looks big in their jeans? I think you’ll be in trouble.” With that green dot, people will stop asking … they only do that with someone they know will lie to them.
May 5, 2011 at 10:38 am
Oh good grief Bud…pressure,pressure,pressure.
Ohmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Thank you so much.
May 5, 2011 at 6:49 pm
You are very welcome. I enjoy reading you … and there is no pressure (although I’m sure the Queen of One Liners could come up with some wicked world-fixes).
May 5, 2011 at 12:32 pm
Hmmm. Haven’t received an award in a good while -probably because some times, some that I received, I really was speechless (yeah, I know -that’s a hard one to believe of me, isn’t it?) in how to respond. If they tended to be memes, I just blocked them out of my mind. LOL (Don’t do well with them, ya know.) I am getting better at listening to what others have to say before interjecting my own commentary though and lying -well, I’ve often been accused of being too honest, as in “tell us how you REALLY feel!” Name calling though -well I generally reserve that for our local rep in Harrisburg and what I tend to call him, trust me, are all the absolute truth. So there! But my mind is working as I type this of who on my big old bloggers list on my reader would make for great recipients of this award. Should be interesting I do believe. Maybe I can ultimately find another way to play my own game of Six Degrees from Kevin Bacon as I did a week or two bag and in doing so, linked myself to a couple of Pulitzer Prize winners! Loved doing that one!
Thanks again Bud and wonder if we can track the virility of this award then to see how many we have in the mix then?
May 5, 2011 at 6:52 pm
I actually started to track it back from Cheryl’s blog to see how it got there but it was taking too much time. And, yes, I know how some of us hate memes. So there’s no pressure. Just wanted to let you know I enjoy you.
May 5, 2011 at 1:47 pm
Congrats on the award! And I’m looking forward to visiting those five bloggers sites.
May 5, 2011 at 6:54 pm
At first, I thought the whole thing was pretty dorky but then I got into the whole world domination thing.
May 9, 2011 at 10:51 am
Thanks Bud!! I’m still trying to figure out my plans for how to take over the world….lol, but I will post soon though!
May 9, 2011 at 5:52 pm
[...] thank you to Bud over at Older Eyes for kindly bestowing upon me the Overlord Award [...]