Welcome to Bud’s Blog

Posted March 1, 2009 by oldereyes
Categories: feeling older

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes - Marcel Proust

Sometimes Older Eyes work, too - Bud


Necessary Definitions

Sage – a wise man; a man of gravity and wisdom; especially, a man venerable for years, and of sound judgment and prudence.

Curmudgeon – an ill-tempered old person full of stubborn ideas or opinions.

Fool – A person with poor judgment or little intelligence; a jester, a person whose role was to entertain a sovereign and the court, often with foolishness.

I’ve been wondering lately what it would be like to be able to relive my life knowing what I know now. Or if I was able to give my grown children a view of the world through my Older Eyes, would it change their lives? Here’s a provocative proposition: If I could get every twenty-year old to look at the world through sixty-four year old eyes for just a few minutes, it would either change them for the better or kill them. Provocative but probably not true. I doubt there are many young men making bucket lists as a result of watching Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman.

With a do-over unlikely and getting my children to listen to my archaic opinions only slightly less so, I’ll record the view through my Older Eyes here in Bud’s Blog.   As you read each post, you decide … Sage, Curmudgeon, or Fool … we can agree to disagree on which is which. Your comments are welcome, whatever your age.   If what you read changes you for the better, I’d especially like to know.   Hopefully there will be no casualties.   If you are new here and want a taste of my Older Perspective before diving in, The Best of Feeling Older offers a few of my favorite posts on aging.  Finally, if my work inspires you to try blogging … or even if you think, Jeez, I can do this better than Older Eyes – there are a series of posts on doing just that on my page, Starting a WordPress Blog.

Monday Smiles – 3/2/2015

Posted March 2, 2015 by oldereyes
Categories: Monday smiles

Tags: , , , , , ,

russian boardMy wife, Muri, and I attend a lot of theatrical events ranging from drama and comedy to musicals.  We attend concerts of classical music, jazz or rock and roll.  We occasionally attend more diverse fare, like dance or magic shows or acrobats, courtesy of Goldstar Events, the half-price ticket outlet that sends a list of available events by email every week.  We’ve seen the Blue Man Group and Cirque du Soleil at sea.  Consequently, a show rarely strikes us as completely unique.  This weekend, Goldstar was offering tickets to Sequence 8, a show by Les 7 Doigts de la Main (Seven Fingers of the Hand), billed on the Goldstar site as a Canadian cirque troupe.   The show was a combination of performance art, comedy, interesting music, acrobatic choreography and cirque acts that left the audience gasping. Read the rest of this post »


Posted March 1, 2015 by oldereyes
Categories: movies

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spockAs I was reading the news on my Android tablet this Friday morning, a banner drifted across the top of the screen in red:  Leonard Nimoy Dies at 83.  Like many others, I’m sure, my first thought was that Spock is dead. And I wanted to write this post … with this title.  But I wondered: Is it dismissive to say goodbye to an actor in the name of his best known character rather than his real name? Perhaps,  but perhaps not. Nimoy himself was ambivalent about his identification with the half Vulcan, half human member of the crew of the Enterprise.   In 1977, Nimoy authored I Am Not Spock, in which he wrote about the rest of his life and seemed to distance himself from his alter ego.  After publishing his second autobiography, I Am Spock, he expressed regret that he wrote the first.  At any rate, I only knew Nimoy as Spock, so this is the only personal farewell I can write.  If you are interested in more about the man himself, I’d recommend the article in Variety.
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Dr. Chuck

Posted February 28, 2015 by oldereyes
Categories: feeling older

Tags: , , , ,

dr chuckThis morning, while I was sitting in the park I received a text from my wife that a neighbor in our old neighborhood had passed away after a long battle with an assortment of ailments.  We were not close friends and we’d pretty much lost touch since we moved to Anaheim Hills 15 years ago.  Muri would occasionally run into his wife in a store and we would hear bits and pieces about him from mutual acquaintances.   His son, who we knew as Jay-Jay was probably my daughter’s best neighborhood friend and he played on several teams that I coached, so we saw a lot of each other.  Besides, he was also our kids’ pediatrician … Dr. Chuck to them.   He was always there for them, whether in his house or in his office, and his gentle humorous way made them trust him, whether they were there to have booster shot or a broken bone set.

The news hit me harder than I thought it would.  You might think that the passing of a contemporary makes me sad because it reminds me of my own mortality but you’d be wrong.  Being reminded of my own mortality makes me determined to use the time I have wisely.  Lately, though, every passing seems like another missed opportunity, an opportunity to tell someone they made a difference in my life.   I suspect that at some level, Dr. Chuck knew how many children … and parents … benefited from his care.   But it would have been nice to tell him.  I have no idea what an afterlife looks like, whether it’s streets paved with gold or a giant family room where we get to sit around with the people we’ve missed.  I don’t believe in a God that burns souls for eternity but I do expect we have to face up to our misdeeds in some way or other.  If we do, I hope that we also get to feel the gratitude of those we’ve helped in life and left behind.  And I hope our friend can feel what I never got to express in life wherever he is now – Thank you, Dr. Chuck.  You made a difference in our lives.

It’s so easy to take for granted the good people bring to our lives and assume they know that we appreciate them.  That we like them.  That we love them.  There will always be time to tell them later.  But there won’t.  Tell them … now.


Monday Smiles – 2/23/2015

Posted February 23, 2015 by oldereyes
Categories: Monday smiles

Tags: , , , , , ,

workingHere it is, almost 4:30 p.m. and I have not been out of the house, which means … since I mostly work at home … that I have not been out of the office.  The office, of course, at this stage of my life is wherever I am working.  After breakfast and spending some time catching up on the news on my tablet. I dragged my trusty laptop (still preferable to my tablet for real work) to the kitchen table and spent the morning reviewing material for a legal case on which I am employed as an expert.  It is the nature of that business that there are long breaks as attorneys negotiate or await the results of mediation, long breaks during which I forget some of the details of the case.  Now, mediation has failed and the case will go to trial, so I am rereading statements I wrote months ago to remind me of what I knew back then.  I spent the afternoon doing the same thing in my office.  There are thousands of pages of documents and even more information online to be considered.  I am missing a beautiful sunny Socal day.  This case has come back to life just as the largest job my partner and I have ever won is starting.  I am likely to be working more hours than I planned.   I never expected to be working this much as I navigate the second half of my seventieth year, and my age also means that I am required to withdraw money from my IRA this year.  I could get hammered on my taxes.
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Unearned Aches

Posted February 21, 2015 by oldereyes
Categories: feeling older

Tags: , , ,

imageI got up this morning at about eight am and headed to the park as I usually do on Saturday.  With my busy schedule and my tendency to be Distracted by Shiny Objects, most days, I only do some of the items on the list I casually refer to as my Morning Practice but on Saturday, I like to try to do them all, which means most Saturday mornings, I’m here until noon.  No, the list isn’t that long but even in the park there are Shiny Objects.  As always, my intentions were good this morning.  My mother used to say with some regularity that, The road to hell is paved with good intentions.  I guess either Mom was wrong or I’ve lived up to enough of my good intentions to stay North of Hades.
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Shiny Objects

Posted February 19, 2015 by oldereyes
Categories: perspectives

Tags: , , , ,

DUAL CACTUSThis morning, I was sitting in the bedroom of our Little House in the Desert talking to my wife, Muri, and mid-sentence, I noticed something over her shoulder through our bedroom window, which looks across the 15th fairway of the Golf Club at Johnson’s Ranch toward the San Tan Mountains.  On one of the smaller peaks that defines our community stood two nearly identical Saguaro cactus, so similar that I thought it might be an optical illusion caused by refraction in our double paned windows.  My train of thought left the station and I found myself leaning this way and that decide.  It was real.  When I pointed them out to Muri, she looked and nodded patiently.  She’s used to it.  Talking, walking, driving … whatever I’m doing, I tend to notice small details around me.  It’s more than noticing, I suppose … I find the small random coincidences around me fascinating.  I know it can be annoying to some when I comment on a butterfly that flutters past the window in the middle of a serious conversation. But my grandkids love it that I notice bunnies in the backyard as we’re playing The Memory Game on the living room floor and that I’m almost as excited as they are when they find the turquoise blue stone among the tan rocks that line the road on the way to our rec center. But last week someone in our Thursday Night Men’s Meeting used the phrase Distracted by Shiny Objects to describe his Attention Deficit Disorder. Looking on up ADD on WebMD,  I discovered that to some degree or other, I have a tendency to exhibit a number of the symptoms listed:
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Monday Smiles – 2/16/2015

Posted February 16, 2015 by oldereyes
Categories: Monday smiles

Tags: , , , , ,

It is Sunday Night.  The fifty-first Valentine’s Day with my wife, the love of my life, is history, perhaps overshadowed by the tenth birthday of my oldest grandson, Reed.   The guest room of our Little House in the Desert is full of sleeping grandchildren.   Since tomorrow is Presidents’ Day, they have the day off from school, so we can have the pleasure … and exhaustion … of their company for one more day.  They will be up early and quiet is not their specialty.  They’ll whisper at first but sooner or later, they’ll start to giggle then laugh and one of us will have to get up and see what’s going on.  Breakfast will be earlier and noisier than we’d like and our usual morning routines will be on hold for a few days, displaced by stories and games.  The plan is to meet my daughter, Amy, who works at the kids’ school and has the day off, too, for a picnic at a park near their house.  By the time dinner time rolls around and we’re headed back to our Little House, I’ll be thoroughly exhausted.   And I’ll be smiling.  After all, it’s Monday.

kids 2_15


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