Missing in the Morning

I’ve always been a morning person, not the kind who wakes up singing and happy but one who arises clear-minded and ready to go.  The first few hours of my day have always been my most productive, particularly in the areas of spirituality, introspection and self-improvement.  I have also always been a night owl, fond, after a day in the engineering trenches, of using my evenings as a time to do things that feed my soul.   Rarely in my life have I been in bed before midnight and when I was younger, one or two was a possibility on a regular basis.  Now, I’m sixty-eight.  My days are not usually spent in the engineering trenches but I still love my mornings and push my evenings as late as this old body will tolerate which means, by the way, some very tired afternoons.  Sometimes that means I nap but often, I tough it out with an extra cup of coffee.

The last week and a half has been a bit of a throwback to my younger days.  A project developing template matching algorithms for sonar and some work I’m doing for an attorney in a trade secret case both have deadlines tomorrow, so I’ve been back in the trenches.  I’ve skipped Morning Pages several days in order to keep Bud’s Blog fed daily.   Several times I’ve gone off to bed at a semi-reasonable hour only to think of a solution to a technical problem that I just had to get up and try out in MATLAB©.  I may not be running on empty but I’m running on fumes.   One result is that I wake up with too many things vying for my morning clarity of mind; how to sort files in Windows or MATLAB; what to post today; what to say about what I’ve already decided to post about; when can I squeeze in a trip to the park;  what makes an algorithm a trade secret; can I get by for one more day without cleaning my office.   In other words, I wake up preoccupied.

A constant in my mornings has been my Coffee Routine.  Put water on the stove, grind some beans (Kona blend) and put the grind in my four cup French press, make some breakfast, pour the water into the press and, after a minute, press the coffee.   Pour a cup and take my morning Metformin (for blood sugar), then eat.   Except one day last week, I dropped the Metformin tablet into my coffee.  It wasn’t a total mind-freeze … the minute the tablet left my hand, I said, What the hell am I doing?  But there it was, in the bottom of my cup.  Oh, Bud , you need to slow down, Muri said, getting even for the times I’ve told her the same thing.  I’d gone Missing in the Morning.  Or, as my friend, Truck, is fond of saying, Lost in thought … send search party.

Today, in the midst of my Coffee Routine, when I went to pour the hot water into the French press, the ground coffee was nowhere to be found.  I knew I had ground it … the grinder was still sitting on the counter and its morning whine was still ringing in my ears.  I looked in the grinder … no coffee.  I checked the basket on our drip coffee machine, thinking maybe I’d switched to my Other Coffee Routine.  Nope.  Then, I checked the airtight canister that I use to store the unground beans.  I’d poured the grind back in with the beans.  I was Missing in the Morning again.

Tomorrow’s Friday.  I’ll send off my final inputs on the legal case and have a conference call with our sonar customer.   Things will slide back again to semi-retired.  And, hopefully, I’ll be Back in the Morning.

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2 Comments on “Missing in the Morning”

  1. Don’t read till tomorrow Morning:

    Welcome Back!

  2. This totally cracked me up.

    I am NOT a morning person AT ALL – but the last few weeks, I’ve had to get up early for all of my doctors appointments. I can’t wait for all of this to be over so I can go back to my NIGHT schedule!

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