On the Spiritual Plateau

sunriseLately, I have been a an unfamiliar place spiritually.  I sit in 12-Step meetings with the feeling that I’ve heard it all before and after 20 years, I suspect I have heard most of the ways to work the program.   The sense of community and the honesty still draws me but the spiritual content neither drives me or drives me crazy as it used to.  That feels odd.   I don’t have any books from the spirituality aisle at Barnes and Noble or from Amazon.com working and I haven’t for some time.  The ones I’ve read previously are gathering dust whereas I used to find myself referring back.  I seem to have reached a point where I’m comfortable with my simple faith such as it is, uninclined to explore further.  Perhaps I’m just luxuriating in having Come to Believe after years of doubting that I ever would.  I find myself able to sit through religious ceremonies, enjoying those parts to which I can relate without continually silencing that cranky inner duet, my Inner Curmudgeon and Inner Cynic.  I seem to be on a Spiritual Plateau.

The latest version of the Men’s Retreat I’ve attended twice yearly for seven years is coming up and I haven’t signed up.  I could, surprisingly, let it pass.  But I won’t.  I may be on a plateau but being a Seeker is a hard habit it break.  Maybe the retreat will light a spiritual fire under me … or maybe I’ll learn I like it here on the Spiritual Plateau.  Maybe after sixty-eight years of seeking, it’s home.  We’ll see.

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