Turn Around Thursday
If you’ve been following along on my last few posts, this post will sound familiar. I have been fighting the blues in the midst of a charmed life. Contrary to what many believe, having a charmed life does not excuse one from fighting the blues. A charmed life is still a life, and life brings a mixed bag of experience to everyone, some joyous, some good, some bad and some tragic. What makes a life charmed is the proportion of joyous and good, not the absense of bad. I have friends who would tell me, All experiences are neutral, it is what you think about them that makes them good or bad. If that works for you, have at it … it doesn’t work for me. I need to feel each experience because I believe that to the degree I avoid life’s valleys, I also avoid its peaks. However, I don’t need to dwell in the valleys and that’s what I’ve been doing.
The experience that’s been the catalyst for my latest bout with the blues is the departure of my daughter’s family to another state. I’ve done all the necessary head-work to see that on the scale from joyous to tragic, its not a very big deal, very nearly neutral experience my friends talk about. But even in the midst of this charmed life, it feels like what my Mom called The Straw That Broke the Camel’s Back, and if I stare at it long enough, I’ll forget that my life is charmed. Sometimes, for me, the way out of the blues is to make a decision to look away from what’s bringing me down and notice the good things in my life. And to stop waiting for life or anyone else to make me happy. I have to admit, sometimes, I hate that. I want someone to throw me a line and sometimes they do. But when they don’t, I can find my own. This old camel’s back isn’t going to break. It’s Turn Around Thursday.
Tags: family, feeling older, grandchildren, mindfulness, psychology, sadness
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Older Eyes 
June 12, 2015 at 4:10 am
It gives me comfort to read this, to know that I’m not the only one who has trouble sometimes focusing on just how very good I have it. (A former coworker used to LOVE to point out to others when they were struggling with “first world problems.” He was one of those who never had trouble recognizing how blessed his life was. Lucky him.)
As far as your daughter and her family’s move – I think you have a right to feel sad about it. I agree that in the big picture, it’s not the most tragic of events. But you love them fiercely, and from your posts, it’s no secret just how much you treasure your time with them. You’ve had the good fortune to stay closely connected and now that won’t be quite so easy as it used to be. It’s natural to grieve such a thing. But I’m glad you’re shifting your focus to more positive thoughts.
June 19, 2015 at 4:21 pm
Heh – it’s fine to feel sad about this.
I haven’t had to face that as yet with my three children but I’m sure I will given they are all adult and getting on with their lives and I’m sure I’ll feel just as you do even though I too have a life I’m very lucky to have.